


Should've Shot Him in the Mouth

by stonerjohnlaurens



Series: History Obliterates (The Modern Hamilton Universe) [5]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: (No rape/non-con though - I promise), Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Date Rape Drug/Roofies, Fluff, I don't endorse the actions in this fic at all, M/M, Neurodivergent Lams, Swearing, kind of?, non-binary Lafayette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-04-10
Packaged: 2018-06-01 08:05:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6509824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stonerjohnlaurens/pseuds/stonerjohnlaurens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr Prompt Fic, A short little one-shot.</p><p>25. "I can't believe you talked me into this."</p><p>AKA join the Charles Lee hate club!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Should've Shot Him in the Mouth

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is also an AU in which this drug is legal in the US?? I completely forgot it wasn't until I posted it on Tumblr.

“It’s not that bad, stop complaining.” 

“It _so_ is that bad. Look at him. He’s probably fucking _dead_.”

“Well, hopefully.” Alexander dragged Charles off of his bed, his body landing on the dorm room rug with a loud thud. He didn’t stir at all, literally comatose.  

“Alex, we’re on the 3rd floor, you can’t just throw the guy around.”

“Would anyone really care if he was dead though, honestly? What, he has like one friend, right? And it’s most likely Adams.”

“Are you listening to me at all? Dude, you fucking poisoned him.”

“Technically, my dear Laurens, _you_ poisoned him. I was only an accomplice.”

“Yeah, bull-fucking-shit, you were the mastermind in this whole operation! Don’t you remember? You were the one begged to meet with him in his room talking about some bullshit truce, you gave him the coffee–”

“Which you mixed, my darling John. Rohypnol. The shit does wonders.”

“Why do you have this shit, anyway? Alex…”

“Good God, no, John, it’s prescribed for me for severe insomnia, back when i was in inpatient. Do you think me some kind of villain?”

“Kinda. This is quite the feat.”

A large pause bloomed between them. John was incredulous. He let his (deviant, horrifyingly charming, slick bastard of a) boyfriend talk him into _this,_ this _madness,_ this despicable yet somewhat-warranted (?) revenge.

“Maybe he’ll think the next time he uses a slur like that,” Alexander smirks, completely excusing his behavior.

“Hmph.”

“Oh, lighten up, John. you can’t tell me you weren’t foaming at the mouth too. He literally looked Lafayette in the eyes as he said it.”

"I’m not going to say he doesn’t deserve to be punished,” John starts. His blood boils at the thought of it, Charles really taking time out of his schedule to verbally accost his dear friend with a transphobic slur. He knew something should be done; the screaming match that ensued after the exchange didn't satisfy Alex or John in the slightest. But…

“…But this doesn’t seem fair. We should’ve just decked him or somethin’, fought like real men do. This is slimy, cruel, _deplorable_ …”

“Oh, yeah, baby, the way you say those SAT level words is so fucking sexy.” Alex pants, feigning interest and then proceeding to crack up at his own antics.

“You’re truly the fucking worst.”

“Aw, but you still love me!”

“The. Worst.”

“Anywho, let’s proceed to part two!” Alex clapped his hands together in glee. “Late classes don’t last forever, you know. His roommate will be back any second.”

“I don’t know, Alex, I really rather would’ve just punched the guy. Tearing up his room while he’s…out like this…that seems cowardly and childish…”

“Did i happen to mention he called Professor Washington the n word?” Alex said, tugging at John’s shirt sleeve. “because that also totally happened.”

“…Okay, let do this.”

“Alright!” Alex was nearly bouncing at this point, seemingly exhilarated, but John was all heat now. He wanted to fucking kill Lee. Alex prefaced their little “prank” with no physical contact, but he couldn’t see adhering to this rule when–-

“Hey! John!”

“What,” he said flatly, trying to mask his fury with indifference.

Alex pushed over Lee’s tableside lamp, letting the shattering glass echo through the room. He got up on his tiptoes and kissed John’s cheek. “I love you.”

John blushed and rolled his eyes, pretending that didn’t mean the world to him.

**Author's Note:**

> I hate these reckless idiots.  
> The best part about this, though? They'd totally do this. The real John Laurens shot Charles Lee in the side for being a little bitch while Alexander egged him on, why wouldn't this happen??  
> Also, I get to plug Alex and John's neurodivergence in this AU.
> 
> tumblr: actualjohnlaurens  
> twitter: gayjohnlaurens


End file.
